✦ UPDATE 220 ✦
Mai (thoda hass ke, thoda gusse mai): Aabe… tunne yeh jo mera hard karwa rakha hai… iska ilaaj kar!
---
Masoom (ghusse mai, aankhein bandh, lips hilate hue): Baby… mai bahut ghussa hoon… usne kuch nahi kiya… Muuuuaaahhhh!
Kdev (has kar): Aila… gandi ji… bole the pyaar ke liye kuch bhi karo… mai jaakar bedroom sajaata hoon bhai!
Masoom (kiss ke baad, cute sa smile): Muaaaahaaaahhh… haaa… aur lekar… mere dev ko… roses bahut pasand… khushboo wahi rakhna
Kdev (dramatic hero style): Ekdum kadak… ekdum… condom… kaunsa?
Teno mai shock!
Janu /
Masoom: Kyaaaa?!
Masoom (khadi hokar): Dev… isko naa… bahar naa nikala karo… yeh ek number ka c…
Mai (jaldi se): Naa naa… gaali nahi… mujhe gaali mat do!
Masoom (rooth kar): Ek toh mai itna pareshan hui… aur aapse milke… pyaar ka sara suroor utar diya isne!
Mai (uske baal kaan ke peeche karta hua, dheere se): Bus karo… ghussa naa karo… aur tu jaa… jaakar chai le aa!
Kdev: Koi chhotu hoon kya… chai laau?
Janu (nakhre se): Jaao naa jaan…
Kdev: Aye haaye… aise bologi toh… mai apni pant utar kar bhi chala jaaunga!
Woh gate khol kar bahar gaya…
🌧 Scene cut – drawing room mai:
Mai: Janu… ab ghar wale dekhenge… Kdev ko kaise ghoorenge…
Kdev ko bahar sab dekh rahe the…
Maa (thoda taana maar ke): Yeh Saloni… teri dost kyun gayi us room mai?
Komal: Mom… mai jaakar dekhti hoon… kya hua…
Maa: Aur tu aise kya dekh raha hai?
Kdev (dil mai): (Filhaal toh Komal ka figure…)
Maa (ghur ke): Bol naa!
Kdev (jhatke se): Woh maa… chai dena… teen… paanch cup!
Kirti: Paanch? Andar toh chaar log hain naa…
Kdev: Hhhhaa… woh… t… toh hai!
Komal (hass ke): Arey mai jaa rahi hoon naa… isliye kaha… tum rehne do…
Kdev (jaldi se): Theek hai theek hai… mai nahi jaa raha…
Komal (hass ke): Masoom didi bhi naa…
Amit: Didi? Woh tumhari didi hai?
Masoom: Woh… matlab… senior friend hai… isliye didi bolte hain…
Saloni: Haan haan… dost bhi par senior…
Sumit: Phir woh Dev ki dost kaise?
Shikha: Arre… woh hai hi aisa… na jaane kisko dost bana le… aur na jaane kisko…
Shikha: Tuh sab nashta kar… Komal… chai le aa!
Maa: Chhod… mai le aati hoon..
Komal: Nahi nahi… mai le jaaungi… aap pareshan naa ho!
Maa: Arey nahi beta… warna tu bhi kahegi… meri saas abhi se meri khabar lene lagi!
Komal (pyar se): Mummy ji…
Maa (hass ke): He he… jaa…

Andar:
Mai: Kya hua bey… bina liye aa gaya?
Kdev (sofa par palti maar ke): Arey… item la rahi hai naa!
Mai: Item kisko bola bey?
Kdev: Arey… khoobsurati ki tareef kar raha hoon… pasand toh nahi…
Mai: Chal andar aa!
Kdev: Yaar chai toh peene de…
Janu (mere paas aa kar): Bhai ko kab yaad aayega… kab tak theek honge…
Mai: Ek do ghante lagenge… tab tak letne do… bed par…
Gate khula –
Komal aayi…
Masoom: Komal…!
Komal: Didi… aap gayi…?
Masoom (uth kar gale lag gayi): Jahaan yeh… aur tum sab… wahi mai…
Janu: Bahut time laga diya aane mai!
Masoom (rooth ke): Ek sketch chhod ke gayi… keh rahi thi… bahut time laga!
Mai: Bus karo… ab aa gayi ho naa…
Masoom: Aap ekdum chup raho… ekdum!
Mai (cute tareeke se ungli muh par): Ok…
Janu: Mujhe kaise pata chalta… mere saath kya ho raha hai!
Komal: Waise ek khushkhabri deni hai…
Masoom: Kya? Jaldi bata!
Komal: Neha ko beta hua hai!
Masoom: Kyaaaa… kab… kaise… mujhe milna hai…!
Mai (masti se): Rehne do… bahut bigada hua paida hua hai!
Masoom: Aapko chup rehne ko kaha tha naa
Mai: Ok ok… mai kuch nahi bolta…
Masoom (cute sa nakhre se): Ufff… aap bhi naa… bachon wale kaam naa karo…
Mai (shararat se): Achha… mai bhi baccha lagne laga kya?
Janu (pyar se): Arre… mera baccha naraz ho gaya?
Mai: Kat-ti kyun hai yaar… mere babu ke gaal hi itne pyaare…
Mai (jhatke se): Acha phir… ummmmmmm!
Komal: Hoth bhi bahut tasty aur laal hain…
Mai (hands up drama): Hey bhagwan… aisi biwiya kisi ko naa de…
Komal: Kya kaha?
Mai: Matlab… tum sab toh meri ho… toh wahi maang raha hoon… ki tumhe koi chheen naa le…
Kdev: He bhagwan… aisa pati sabko de…
Mai: Chup kar bey… waise hi bahut hai…
Komal: Par… maine suna… Pari ki tabiyat kharab hai?
Masoom: Kya hua meri Pari ko?
Mai: Kuch nahi… thoda sa… tabiyat thik nahi…
Janu (suddenly, thoda feel karke): Pata nahi kyu… mujhe lag raha hai… is ghar mai aapse bhi jyaada… kisi aur ke paas shaktiya hain…
Mai: Are haan… batana bhool gaya… Aditi aayi hai…
Teeno shock: Aur aap hume ab batate ho?!
Mai (thoda ruk ke): Woh… darasal baat yeh hai…
Janu: Kya hua? Chup kyu ho gaye? Bolo!
Mai (bahut dheere se, aankhon mai halka aansu): Aditi ke pankh… Bhukhasur ne le liye… aur BB ko maar diya…
Komal: Itna sab… kaise
Mai: Dekho… har chiz nahi roki ja sakti… mai bahut baar future jaa kar sab thik karne ki kosis ki… par sab nahi bacha paya…
Masoom: Aap hume bachane ki kosis kab se kar rahe ho?
Kdev (serious): Tumhe kitni baar bataya hai?
Mai: Tu inn baato mai na bole…
Janu (ghusse se): Batao… kitni baar?
Baaki dono bhi: Bolo!
Kdev (slowly): Karib… 478 saal… is saal ko mila ke…
Teeno wahi khade khade… gir ke beth gayi…
---
Mai (halki hasi, fake smile): Arey… yeh jhoot bol raha hai…
Woh dono bas mujhe dekhti rahi…
Mai (toot-te hue): Aise na dekho yaar… tum dono… mujhe pata hai… yeh pagal hai… kuch bhi bolta hai…
Kdev: Oye… marata bhale hoon… par jhoot nahi bolta…
Mai: Tuu muh band rakh… jab kholta hai… galat bolta hai…
Gate khula… kuch log aur aa gaye…
Mai (fake smile): Arey… tum sab bhi aa gaye… sukhad hai…
Par woh sab bhi Masoom aur Janu ke paas beth gaye…
Mai (andar hi andar): Aisa kyun lag raha hai… jaise sab kuch chhin gaya ho…
Mai: Chal bey… bahar chal…
Kdev: Tujhe kya hua bey… tu kyu ro raha hai?
Mai: Tere aankho me aansu dekh ke… mai kaise na rooon…
Mai (gaal par haath rakh ke): Ungliya geeli ho gayi…
Mai: Mujhe nahi batana chahiye tha…
Kdev: Tuh jitna pochega… utne aayenge…
Mai (aansu poch ke): Mar mar kar bhi nahi batana chahta tha unhe…
Kdev: Iss liye kisi ko dhoondne ki kosis nahi ki… tu chahta tha sab khud hi samajh jaaye…
Mai: Haan… future mai bahut ched chad ki… sab khoya… ab time ne mauka diya… kam se kam yaad toh rahunga…
Kdev: Tere bina yaadon ka kya karegi woh… ghut ghut ke mar jayengi…
Mai (halke aansu poch ke): Tuh kab se itna sochne laga....
Kdev: Kitni bhi burai ho… par hoon toh tera hissa naa…
Mai: Mujhe laga… sirf vardaan mila… par asli bojh toh in sab pe hai....
Kdev: Tuh galat soch raha hai…
Mai: Main itni ladkiyon ki zindagi barbaad nahi kar sakta…
Kdev: Matlab tujhe unse pyaar nahi?